Is what I want (sexually) normal?
Nearly every question I’ve been asked in my near decade as a sex educator comes back to this core fear: am I normal?
My answer, 99% of the time? Yes.
It’s human nature to want to fit in. To be reassured that we’re enough, but not too much. That our desires, our very beings are worthy.
In our sex-negative society, that can feel impossible. We’re taught to distrust our bodies and our brains. We’re taught that we can either be the virgin or the whore, and both are flawed. We’re taught to shove down our desires, and put others’ needs before our own.
We’re left with the question: is what I want normal? Am I normal? Am I enough?