What everyone needs to know about sex

Anonymous asks:

What should you know when you just started having sex?

Anonymous—

Congrats on this new chapter of your life! I’m so glad you asked this question at the start of your sexual journey. There are so many myths out there that hold people back from finding freedom in pleasure. Your commitment to avoid those shows me that you’re bound to have an intimate, exciting, and fulfilling sex life.

Whether you just started having sex, have been with your partner forever, or enjoy singlehood, here are 12 things everyone should know about sex.

Your pleasure matters

The pleasure of everyone involved is important. One partner’s pleasure is no more important than another’s, and each person gets to decide what that looks and feels like for themselves.

And you get to define what pleasure means for you

While orgasms rock, they aren’t the be-all and end-all of sex or pleasure. They are one embodiment of pleasure, but not the whole story. Do you feel satisfied? Connected to with your partner(s)? Peaceful? Free? When you focus on maximizing pleasure, you break free of rigid ideas about what good sex looks and feels like, and it helps you have an intimate, exciting, and fulfilling sex life that lasts.

Explore different condom and birth control options

Not all condoms are created equal. And I don’t just mean ingredients, but smell, texture, thickness, etc. Try variety packs to see which ones you like. I currently love the condoms from Maude, as the latex smell and taste is muted. For a non-latex option, I recommend the internal condom, which can be used for vaginal or anal intercourse.

Same goes for your birth control. Are you currently using a form of birth control besides condoms? Are you happy with it? If the answer to either of those questions is no, and you aren’t trying to get pregnant, pause and go explore your options on Bedsider.

Get the other 9 facts on Blood + Milk

Sexy Holiday Gifts

The holidays are here and that means time for shopping! Whether or not gift giving is your or your beau’s love language, gifts are always one way to say I love you. And these gifts? They also help you …